No, really. Here are some of my favorites:
How many religious liberals does it take to change a light bulb? At least ten, to hold a debate on whether or not the light bulb exists. Even if they agree upon the existence of the light bulb, they may not change it, to keep from alienating those who might use other forms of light.
How many Episcopalians does it take to change a light bulb? Ten. One to call the electrician, and nine to say how much they liked the old one better.
How many United Methodists does it take to change a light bulb? Eleven. One to change the light bulb. And ten more to organize a covered dish supper that will follow the changing of the bulb service.
How many Lutherans does it take to change a light bulb? We don’t know yet. They have appointed a committee to study the issue and report back at their next meeting.
How many United Church of Christ members does it take to change a light bulb? We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey, you have found that a light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship to your light bulb and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-lived, and tinted; all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence through Jesus Christ.